Ambien. No doubt about it.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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