Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
