Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
