I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
