can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
