Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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