the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Rumble strips road head = magical
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Randomize