We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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