That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I puked a lego.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
We have started to decorate penises.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
Randomize