Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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