do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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