Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Betty ford says i'm here all night
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
