um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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