i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
