He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
i can't believe i had my finger in that
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize