he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize