So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
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