Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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