i permit you to call me
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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