He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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