i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
