No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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