Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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