nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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