i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize