So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
