the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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