I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
