Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You are a genius and a whore.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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