only if we run a train.
done.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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