Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
Randomize
