fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize
