so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize