Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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