things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
