I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i will never coherently bang her
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
