guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
