You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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