and she was petting her beer can
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
We had sex on a dog bed..
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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