sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize