The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
Randomize
