somebody snuck up and got me drunk
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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