Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Randomize
