Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
Randomize
