I heard we made out
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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