I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
how do you play pong handcuffed?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize