wat bout pragnant strippers??
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
