i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Randomize
