so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We're too hungover to prance.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Randomize