Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i just google imaged poop.
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Randomize
